Prometheus is a great B-movie. But that’s what it is. It’s no masterpiece, no game changer. It’s not next level shit.

But it’s a great b-movie, one that you should see on the biggest screen possible.

Ridley Scott knows how to shoot a film, and who to work with to make sure what it is he’s shooting comes out looking like a million dollars. Prometheus looks FUCKING FANTASTIC. The Special effects are stunning and the visuals are gorgeous throughout. This will be an amazing bluray to demo your awesome home theater to your friends.

The score by Mark Streitenfeld is also great, right from the beginning it elevates the visuals to another level of grandeur. 

This is seriously amazing filmmaking. 

But it’s at the service of a script which, while not the travesty some critics will have you believe, does not bring much new ideas to the table. What we get is a sci-fi thriller that jumps willy-nilly from scene to scene without much flow. However some of those scenes are really, really great. See? So I was wondering if I was gonna write up this movie (because I only talk about stuff I want you guys to see, and this is no Attack The Block), but at the end of the day it’s go so much working for it, I believe that trumps it’s many short comings. 

The fact of the matter is that I had a terrific time seeing this and so did all my friends. I jumped and squirmed and giggled at gross stuff and was never bored. But the script is never, ever smart. Everything that happens I saw coming from a mile away and character motivations switched on a whim for weird reasons. I would get into some of that but I never discuss plot points in my little write ups. Basically, this movie suffers from the wouldn’t it be cool syndrom. The writers knew they were playing in the Alien movie-verse backyard and wrote a movie thinking wouldn’t it be cool if we showed this and that. And yes, it’s cool. MAn, some of it is so fucking cool… But it’s not smart. Alien was smart. Alien had real, three dimentional characters. You got to know these people and they felt close to you after a while. The characters in Prometheus, even the ones you spend more time with, feel a little empty. You know them from one thing that they do, or two. The cool captain, the two friends who wager on stuff, the grumpy techno-punk scientist, the bitch, the passionate couple of researchers, etc. They’re not human beings, they’re adjectives. Still, with the material they’re given, some of them do a decent job. Noomi Rapace, Charlize Theron and Edris Elba are especially fun to watch do what they do. I like Michael Fassbender too, but I didn’t get his character, who isn’t suppose to feel emotions (spoiler: he’s a robot) (seriously, it’s not a spoiler, they tell you like two minutes in) and yet emotes for most of the running time which ended up bugging me. But Fassbender is just great to look at, so, you know, I should shut up.

I’m reading myself back and it feels like I’m harsh. That’s because this is Ridley Scott going back to the world of Alien and, even though I haven’t liked his movies in a long while, somehow that held a promise of greatness. Prometheus is not greatness.

But, hey, it’s a great b-movie.

Prometheus keeps looking better and better. I can’t wait…

I think pretty much every shot from the PROMETHEUS trailer blows my mind. 

So damn epic. So much better than the Dark Knight Rises trailer…

Have an HD gander!


The first trailer for Ridley Scott’s PROMETHEUS is here and it’s fucking great. I LOVE how the tittle appears the same way the Alien appeared in it’s first trailer.

I got no snark for this, it just looks like epic horror/sci-fi.

Thanks to comingsoon for the embed.

Some movies I’m super looking forward to in 2012

-The Innkeepers

A bunch of peeps I know saw it last Summer at the Fantasia film fest and they all loved it. It’s one of the few I missed out on and it’s coming out in February. There’s a trailer out there that I refuse to see. I’m going in this one clean.

-John Carter

Andrew Stanton follows in the footsteps of fellow Pixar wizard (yes, they are wizards, be silent) Brad Bird and makes the jump to live action. He’s adapting pulp classic The Princess of Mars, the first John Carter adventure, published around 1917 or something. People will inevitably accuse it of ripping off Avatar and Starwars and stuff. These people will have the whole thing ass over tits. John Carter was seducing otherwordly princesses before it got cool.

-The Cabin in the woods

When Joss Whedon and Drew Goddard team up to take horror genre conventions for a spin, you stop whatever you’re doing and you bask in their collective genius like the puny lesser human that you are. Or at least I will.

-Marvel’s The Avengers

Joss Whedon is given amazing toys and ressources to pit Iron Man and Hulk and all their buddies against something probably mean and rude. I’m there.


Ridley Scott returns to the world his Alien franchise takes place in. I think this movies happens before all that stuff though. In any event it’ll look great. Also it has Michael Fassbender in it and I’m at least 5% gay for him.


It’s Pixar doing a movie not involving cars, so I’m in.

-The Dark Knight Rises

Um. You really need a description?


Ryan Johnson did an amazing film called BRICK, then he followed that up with a fantastic and completely different film called THE BROTHERS BLOOM. LOOPER is his third film, that’s enough for me. But hey, when it’s about future Bruce Willis being time machined back to the present to be assassinated by his younger self (played by regular joe Joseph Gordon Levitt) it seriously garantees my ass in the seat.

-The motherlovin’ Hobbit

(that’s not an official poster, there isn’t one yet)

I just like their hairy feet.

-Django Unchained

(that’s not an official poster, there isn’t one yet)

Quentin Tarantino is doing a cowboy movie about an escaped slave seeking vengeance or justice or something equally badass. Look, it’s Tarantino and he’s in my top five. I’m going.

That’s it for now. I’m sure I’m forgetting a thousand movies but it’s 6 AM and I really should find my keys.

Later, film lovers