...or the amazing chronicles of everything that I like and stuff.
Tim woke up at 7 AM for exactly 6 seconds. That is how long it took for him to murder his alarm clock against the bedroom wall opposite his bed. He promptly fell back asleep and remained this way until his stomach shook him awake for food, a couple of minutes shy of 1 PM. He should have dressed in a panic, omit brushing his teeth hoping coffee would camouflage his bad breath (fyi to people who do that: it does not work, please stop) and run out of the house towards the office, but he did not. He put on clean underwear and proceeded to the kitchen to prepare two stomach’s worth of eggs and toasts and a tall glass of orange juice – extra pulp like he liked it. Done eating, he finished getting dressed, brushed his teeth and left the house, a full five hours behind schedule.
He knew the way to work very well for having walked it five days a week for the last ten years, but today he did not follow it. It was a sunny day so today he went to the park. It was a big park and it was mostly empty because there are buildings everywhere outside the park, and those buildings are filled with offices and these offices are cluttered with cubicles and on week days those cubicles eat people, which leaves parks pretty much people-less.
Tim sat alone on a bench. It was nice to feel the breeze carress his face. It was not a pushy breeze, it was a shy one, which is the perfect type of breeze to feel on your face. The sun shone, its heat traveled across outer space, broke through all the different layers of the sky and came to rest onto his face. That heat that comes from outer space, Tim thought, is very comfortable. It is second only to campfire heat, which is the very best heat.
He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and took it out. The digital screen said he had missed 15 calls so far today, and that there was an incoming call from work. Tim hesitated. Finally he accepted the call and took the phone to his ear.
“Hello?” Tim said.
“Tim, finally!” a voice said, “Where are you? Are you okay?”
“I’m in the park; about five minutes walk from my place, the one we were at with Joyce when she said the thing about the dog.”
“The thing, you remember? How she wanted to take her dog to a dog shrink, he didn’t touch his food much and seemed depressed and she wanted to take him to the dog shrink. You asked if there was a tiny couch for the dog to lie on.”
“I remember the dog thing, Tim, I’m asking what as in what are you talking about, we have a presentation in like fifteen fucking minutes.”
Tim felt a little bad about that, truth be told.
“The powerpoint is ready, it’s in a folder named “presentation” on my desktop. It’s all ready, it’s good, but I won’t be there. It’s just you.” There was a little pause. “I’m sorry” Tim added.
“What the fuck, Tim?” the voice said.
“I don’t know what to tell you, I’m not coming” Tim said.
“Jesus Christ,” the voice said, “fine. I’ll see you tomorrow, then.”
“No, you’re not hearing me,” Tim said, “I don’t think I’m coming back. I’m not coming back to work.”
There was silence for a long time. Finally the voice said: “Okay… Okay, what are you going to do, Tim?”
Tim thought about that for a moment, and said: “Amazing things. Or impossible things. Amazing and / or impossible things. Every damn day.”
End of part one.
Did you know?
It is, it’s unbelievable. This Friday sees a celebration of all the great things that cinema can do, so I’m going to briefly guide you through it. Click in the film title to see a trailer.
We have a beautiful little drama in the shape of Destin Cretton’s Short Term 12 coming out. This is one I have not seen yet but word from SXSW was extremely positive and I will definitely see it.
We have Edgar Wright’s The world’s end for a good dose of comedy and sci-fi fisticuffs. everybody is raving about this one and, having seen it, I can say it deserves every praise.
We have a fantastic horror movie, too: Adam Wingard’s You’re next. This movie is an absolute blast. No horror fan should miss it.
Finally, how about a kick-ass, beautifully shot kung-fu film from master-filmmaker Wong Kar Wai? The Grandmaster comes out on limited release this Friday as well. I haven’t seen it so I can’t vouch for it, but it looks gorgeous and super bad ass.
August 23rd 2013: The best movie day of the year.
Elmore Leonard has passed away. What a tremendous loss. He was my absolute favorite author.
Gallerie 1988 is doing an official Edgar Wright Art Show. This is one of the pieces that will be presented. It’s awesome. Enjoy spotting characters from Spaced, Hot Fuzz and The World’s End, as well as Scott Pilgrim and his friends. I want this thing on my wall… The artist who did this great piece goes by the moniker “100% soft”. Great job, sir!
Everything is bad and wrong and terrible and I’m sad all the time. That’s the truth. But sometimes there’s a good movie that comes out and it makes me happy and it opens up in my head and it lets a world in, free to roam inside me, in my thoughts, and I think about it and get lost in it and there’s really nothing quite like it. Still, the world is the worst and people don’t think I’m pretty and also I’m old and always sad. But. But sometimes an artist I like will write a song I like or an album and I’ll fall in love with some melodies and yes it’s love it’s not something else. It’s not appreciation or admiration it’s love. And I’m in love with the song or the songs and it feels good but I’m still sad all the time. Because there’s every reason to be sad it seems. Because everything is terrible and why do I hate myself so much and why am I not doing more things to improve or better myself and everything is grey and cold and bleak and I’m depressed. But then I’m on the internet or flipping through an art magazine and I’ll discover an illustrator or painter or a sculptor, someone who just makes beautiful things or thought provoking things and I’ll be fascinated and awed because talent and cleverness and skill impress me so much and it makes me feel alive just to see what great artists can produce and it makes everything worthwhile doesn’t it. But no this place is the worst and I walk around feeling lonely and wrong about everything and I just want to punish myself for being only me and not something more and not something great, someone special. I’m a guy with hair on his back but not on his head and I can’t get rid of my belly even though I run 10K every two days because I eat like an asshole because eating well depresses me man I am so depressed. But then I get with my friends and they are an amazing bunch and they are flawed like me and they have moments of brilliance and they have moments of failures and they have weaknesses and I find them so powerful because no matter how difficult it gets here they are and I guess here we all are and we’re together and yes it’s tough and sometimes I cry and maybe you do too but you’re here and I’m here and it hasn’t stopped you and we haven’t quit yet and the small moments of illumination make it all worth while don’t they?